In Which Karkat Hits on Eridan
by Haospart
Summary: Karkat gets drunk, oh joy, and puts some moves on Eridan, who's not really sure how to feel about it. Erikar, Karkat being a 'I will hit on YOU' drunk in front of everyone, idk if there's any fluff, but I thought it was funny. (Romance cuz I think it fits, kinda)


A/N: this has been on my mind all day. I own neither Karkat nor Eridan, or Homestuck. Or anything related to Homestuck. Well, I bought a hoodie and calendar, but that's all I own even sort of relating to Homestuck. But I don't own it. Hussie does. Also for this fanfic, this is an alternate timeline in which a lot of people survive to meet the humans on the meteor. So this is on the meteor, but it's also with people alive. Yeah. :D A/N over

The hallways of the facility were as dark, cold and damp as ever. This meteor was rocketing off into space at alarming rates, but nobody really cared at the moment. The only real change for the normally empty hallways was the quiet pinging and loud swears as a short, overworked troll stumbling around into walls.

He finally made it over the the transportalizer that came out into the main lounging space, where everyone hung out since trolling the humans through _time_ was over. He stood on top of it, swaying a bit but making a calculated effort to stay upright. When the device finally took him where he wanted he let a lazy grin split his features.

It was cool for him to have everyone looking at him, he thought it was at least. They stared in shock at his horribly tinted face, his cheeks and nose stained a brilliant red. His hazy, unfocused eyes gave them the hint that he probably wasn't in his right mind as he tripped over his own feet.

He stumbled for a while, before getting both of his hands on a wall and steadying himself. With a nervous giggle, he turned around and leaned back against the wall. He surveyed his surroundings carefully, not really taking it in until his gaze landed on one particular seadweller.

"Here'sa fucker I been lookin' for, you hidin' from me 'er somethin?" he slurred, pushing off from the wall and closing the distance between them alarmingly fast.

Eridan, who had been standing up at the time, stepped back a little. This was new behavior, and he struggled to process the actions directed towards him from the little Vantas. He was nearly backed into the wall when Karkat pushed his body flush against the other's.

"Hey there, hot stuff," the mutant-blood drawled, smoothing out his rough voice as well as he could. He looked up at the much taller troll, licking his lips a little as he sized up the seadweller.

Eridan bit his lip nervously, his mind shorting out a little bit at the especially heated touch of the rather universally accepted 'leader' of the original enterprise. He still managed to squeak out a quick "Hi" though, in a pitch he'd later deny.

"I ass'd you a q'estion. Ye been hidin'? Izzat where you been, you sexy beast?" he backed Eridan up against the wall, not really registering his target's frantic gaze flicker about the room for assistance.

"Ah, n-no. Kar, I haven't been hiding. Where, where have you been? What in the world have you been _doing_?" he took a quick breath, wrinkling his nose, "Your breath smells awful!"

"Always askin' the wrong questions, ain'cha? But I guess I'll answer 'em anyways," he dragged out the word 'anyways' for near an eternity. "I found a buncha bottles out in 'a back rooms. So I had a little somethin' from 'em. Damn, you're hot though. Fuck, y' could roast a lusus," he got a grip on Eridan's horns before dragging him down into a hot, sloppy kiss.

Eridan yelped in surprise, struggling to remove Karkat's hands from his horns. Granted, his were pretty big and thus, a hell of a lot less sensitive than those with smaller horns ie Karkat and maybe Sollux.

However, he did manage to disentangle himself from Karkat's grip, holding the younger troll out at arms length, "Look, Kar, I'm not about to let you do this. You are obviously not in your right mind and I'd be an ass to let you go ahead with what you're trying for," the small troll looked confused and almost heartbroken. Eridan quickly added, "It has nothing to do with you. Or me. Regardless of how I feel about you, I will not take advantage of you like that. I will not let you have a go at someone like me while you're so heavily impaired."

The devastated look on Karkat's face didn't lighten any, and little tears gathered at the corners of his eyes. He even looked down, letting a couple red-tinted drops hit the floor.

Eridan hissed quietly, as if the tears burned him, before bending down to Karkat's height, "Hey, Karkat. Don't cry, oh please don't cry. If it makes you feel better, you can sleep with me tonight. All clothing will remain _on_. So don't get any ideas," the devious glimmer in Karkat's eyes vanished the instant the source was cut off and he pouted.

"Fine. 's long as you hold up yer end," the mutant was surprisingly reasonable despite being drunk as fuck.

The seadweller nodded emphatically, taking his hand before leading him off to the transportalizer.

The next morning, Karkat woke to the feeling of an arm draped around his torso and the smell of sea salt. He would have investigated further, if not for that being exactly when the headache kicked in.

He moaned quietly in pain, mildly surprised when the arm around him moved and a hand rubbed delicately at his temple, soothing the pain a little. He murmured a quiet noise of confusion.

A quiet chuckle answered him, and the accented whisper of his friend, "Well, at least you're not trying to get into my pants now. That's one upside to a hangover. Bartering with you to keep your hands to yourself was exhausting."

Karkat whined as his memory slowly returned, "Well fuck me sideways, did I really do what I think I did?"

"Grab my horns and kiss me like I was the last troll alive? Yeah. Did you actually get some? No, like hell I would let that happen."

"Oh good, I remember everything then... Ugh..."

Eridan spent the rest of that day taking care of Karkat's massive hangover, even stopping over by Sollux to ask how to help the nubby-horned troll deal with the headache. He'd managed to surprise a few of them, proving he wasn't this huge desperate sleaze-ball of a troll and did actually give a damn.

He'd ask Karkat if he really meant what he had said later, but if he did, then there were some feelings that needed to be reconciled.


End file.
